Tag Archives: life

New Beginnings

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Last week I finished working at the job I’ve been working at for 5 years. That’s a long time and a lot has happened in that time.

The postives: got another cat, got some new cars, made progress on my Mazda, visited some new places (Amsterdam, Paris, Hamburg, various places in Wales, Cornwall), got married!

Negatives: Got Cancer (and covid); spent the last year working through a company that had gone through multiple acquisitions culminating in me going off on stress leave for around a month.

Enough is enough!

I’ve been engrossed in watching or learning about Cerro Gordo Ghost Town (see Ghost Town Living) and it’s been a really interesting experience watching someone who had no real life experience of living alone in the middle of nowhere. Needless to say he had the quick realisation that he was the only person who could determine anything that happened there, and he’s got some great philiosophical insights. One thing I’ve really taken away from that all is what he said and that is that if you don’t like something, do something about that. And that’s what I did!

Work got too much and after the big C, I have a different outlook on life. Making the most of every day and life in general is important, and I’m not going to spend it being unhappy, so I spent the time I had taken during the absence of leave finding a new job. Big priorities were ensuring it was another remote working role – I’ve been working remotely since around the beginning of the pandemic and I’ve enjoyed it. You do get lonely at times, but at the same time the pros outweigh the cons. Not having to get stressed in rush hour traffic and shout at other drivers is a bonus. That is one good thing that has come out of the pandemic really, and something that I could have done for a long time (working in IT) but it took that to wake a lot of people up.

2021… again!

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I thought I’d name my traditional end of year wrap-up blog post something slightly different. It’s been a bit of a rollercoaster year for me. After everything that happened last year (see Cancer, Chemo and Corona) life has taken a new meaning. It’s taught me that we take everything for granted. Waking up every day and feeling well is a blessing, when so many people have it worse off. I’ve been trying to sieze the moment and do as much as I can. The word “bored” doesn’t exist because I’m always trying to do something. I’ve ticked off a number of odd job things that I’ve had on various lists for years. Sometimes you just have to get up and hustle.

The experiences of what happened to me last yeast were quite frankly the scariest thing I’ve ever had to deal with, and I don’t think anyone will quite understand unless they have had to go through something similar. I have so much to thank the NHS for, and which is why anyone who disagrees with getting a vaccine annoys me immensley. The costs of my hospital treatments last year anywhere where “free” health care isn’t provided quite possibly runs into the tens of thousands. I just did a quick Google search for “knee replacement cost” (just one of the many components of my surgery) and the first result came back as £10k, and that’s only scratching the surface. My surgery was 7hrs long with a number of top surgeons at the RNOH in Stanmore. I was in hospital for 2 weeks before being sent home. Then the next phase was nearly 8 months of Chemotherapy with 3 week in patient stays at Leicester Royal Infirmary. Plus monthly physio calls and checkups. You get where I’m going here. I’m so very grateful for living in this country and having this wonderful health service.

I probably should have seen a counciler sooner, to help me deal with the aftermath of spending a whole year out and the mental onslaught of dealing with being told I had Cancer, and then fighting that for a whole year whilst isolating and not being able to have visitors to the hospital. I’ve been keeping busy by throwing myself back into work (not that I’ve been thanked for it once) but no one has kept an eye on me and with the workload building up and up I’ve had to take it into my own hands and take some time off to deal with the stress and reset a little.

Mental health is as important as phsyical health. Last year you could physically see that I hadn’t been well. This year I’m looking fine but mental health has taken a rollocking having to deal with everything and realistically probably masking the issue a little by keeping myself so busy.

Take care of yourselves and one another. Keep an eye out on your friends. No one is invincible.

My Wife Anna and my close friends and family have kept me going through all of this.

At this stage I’m a little fed up of things repeating themselves like Groundhog Day. Let’s hope 2022 is an improvement and we see this Coronavirus off in a timely fashion. 🙂

End of Year wrap-up

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Me Dec 2020

 

Hm, where to start? This year has been a bit crap hasn’t it?  I’ve just tried to light my fire bin in the garden and everything is too sodden. Even the wood I chopped up and put in there is wet and sodden which sums up the year as a whole.

No one knew what would happen at the beginning of the year. I spent last Christmas and New Year with a cancer diagnosis looming over me, and whilst I was going through the operation in Feburary to have a tumour removed from my leg, the news of Covid coming was everywhere. I was lucky that the op went ahead and the chemo which followed was not delayed… as it has been for so many and for those people I really am sorry.

I won’t mull over this too much as I know people do it have it worse off. And I’ve written a bit about that in my last post – Life is relative – but I wouldn’t wish chemotherapy on anyone. It’s one of those things that starts off OK and then as the treatment continues and your immune system is shot, that everything else goes off the rails. I contracted Covid from hospital and spent 3 weeks getting over it. I was blue lit to Northampton general and spent a week there with 38.5degree fevers twice a day underneath a freezing cold air conditioning duct. It was horrendous. Three weeks with a fever that high twice a day wasn’t pleasant. Luckily the disease didn’t go to my lungs as that could have been a different story. I thank my fitness for that but it could have been 50/50.

I’m done with chemo now, and I’m focussing 100% on physio and getting my leg strong again. I’m on track to put on weight again with a target of 79kg… got another 4 to go and I’m working on building upper body strength again as well. I have a page where you can track progress here: Instagram

I want to say a big thank you to my fiancee Annabelle who’s been an absolute star and a rock this year, having to put up with me being in hospital for 3 weeks at a time or more at times and doing much more housework than previously whilst I recovered. I honestly wouldhn’t have been able to do this without her. A big thank you also to my family and friends, for the video calls and calls in hospital to keep the days occupied.

I also want to say a shoutout to the company I work for for being so tolerant and for allowing me to keep my position. I’m phasing back to full time in Jan 2021.

I’ve been able to keep up with freelance work also, which is useful and will be continuing with that next year.

I appreciate life a lot more now, that’s something new. Every day I wake up now is a good day. I saw some not so nice things having been an inpatient in an oncology / heamotology ward for over 6 months. My emotions are wrecked though. The smallest thing can have me balling my eyes out and just looking at photos of last year can do that but I’m stronger and I’m going to be stronger…

 

And that’s a wrap. Thanks for reading and all the best for 2021 if you read this far!